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Thursday, January 20, 2011

is this my Life ?

This Life, I am living, don't feel any connection with it whatsoever, clearly indicating I don't belong here, this is not my life. I seem to be put in somebody else's body and thus Life. As if one fine day, I must have slept over when this swap occurred and here I am dealing with his situations, no use putting me here, I am a sheer waste of the human body.

Family: This guy's family is loving, caring and cool. The mistakes I'm committing here don't even ask, perhaps you wouldn't even want to hear, if I started speaking about them. Inside their minds they may loathe me, or may be not, but on the outer level they never confront me, all my transgressions go unseen and I'm allowed to live as it is, so much compassion and forgiveness, lucky guy he must be, to have been born to these parents.

Lover: As if the mystery of her invisible presence wasn't enough, her On/Off love-hate relation with me is an added bomb to the rugged love-life this guy must be having with her. She's so loving and adorable at one time, and a microwave oven the next instant, comprehensively grilling me, whether its a peccadillo or a blunder that I've committed. She's cute, beautiful and a wonderful person, but hard to be kept happy by a disgust like me.

Friends: The guy must be a clown himself, he's got a friend of each kind funny, serious, neutral, emotional, dutiful you name it he has it. Each one of them has got his own set of problems, still they gather over a cup of tea and dish out advice to every other friend in the group. I don't know what was his equation with these guys, but I just pray, God help him and his friends, may they be at peace.

World : The world is going on as always with its bustling nature, energy flow from here to there and vice versa. The Sun God shining brightly, birds flying free as they wish, people engaging in enjoyable activities, the daily cycle of day & night changing colours, etc. All this except the fact that none of this is affecting me, as if there was an impermeable plastic between me and this world. This makes it quite obvious that I'm not meant to be living this life.

Is this a bad dream ?, it would mean I'm still asleep and seeing my own life where everything is good, but me. Or is it that, I am put through this ordeal only to mend my ways?, and that I would be put back into my life only when I change for good, or worse thing I will have to keep up with this act till I die, as a compensation for a lousy past, I had back there in my own life.

what do You say ?...

9 comments:

@ngel ~ said...

I will tell you. Its your life. Sometimes its happen. And when it does we should slow the pace of everything and just let the things go on their own. We should give ourselves some time.
And believe me! All thoughtful children think this way and all girls are hard to make happy :)
Chill! Everything will be fine.
Take care

sriangood said...

selfanalysis is good but do not get carried away with it ::-))

U r an unique being and the whole universe has to accept u as u r .. and not as per individuals values::-))

Markus said...

awesome blog dear, really touching and each & every word is true. the one i like the most is of Parents & world..... I can't write anything further coz all those question keep puzzling me also from a long long time....

super45 said...

You need some further guidence in this respect to self realizatiion..which is so difficult ..and there fore you remain in a dream than reality

Need some positve guidence from some known spiritual Guru??
But be careful of the Guru?? There are qualities you are to look for

suresh

Hitesh said...

Li

Hitesh said...

Liked it.. Everyone's life is like this..

Bhis said...

Dude...sometimes it happens that u lost ur way n get confused abt things happening around....things jst doesnt work sometimes the way u want them to work but this doesnt mean that u make conclusion out of it that as a mankind u r not worth n alll....sorry if am being rude here...but as long as article is concerned i like it...

Dont worry bad time will pass away i would say just enjoy what u doing...u ll get wht u want in life..may be its not the time but yes u will surely get it..
God bless u!!!

nothingprofound said...

How could this not be your life that you're living? That's just a thought in your head. Sounds like you need to think less and feel more, be more physical, exercise your senses.

cutiepie said...

completely agree with sriangood 's comment....dont eva change urself 4 others ...be as ur ..